The reason I am taking the time to sit and write this blog, is for you, my reader. Whoever you are, I am lucky you came across my writing. I am doing this to hopefully inspire you to pursue your passion, your dream. Through my journey, I hope you get tools and ideas on how to pursue yours. I am sharing my own experience, with no “make up”. Real and straight. Let’s go for a ride, shall we?
"A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination prepared to be herself and only herself" Maya Angelou
I am turning 50 this coming June! What a number, isn’t it? I am fine with the number because I feel healthy, strong, filled with energy, and I believe… still looking good. I am a mother to three growing teens that are wonderful and very loving. I have a supportive husband who has been with me since I was 22. Together we have had many experiences and we are raising our beautiful sons in harmony and understanding. Since I was 15, I have always been on a crazy journey against time, doing and creating things such as crafts, arts, teaching, and again, crafts, arts, teaching.
I have accomplished so many things and yet… I am turning 50! What does this number actually mean? It has been almost a year of thinking about it, feeling that something inside me desperately needs to be fulfilled. Is it because time has a different perception as we get older? Is time running out? I believe so. Probably people feel different about age but I am talking about my own experience.
Something very strong started to bother me inside, something that needed to be manifested and I sat down, I listened and said to myself: Jazmin, you are ready for this like never before!
This past year I have had many conversations with women and with friends about turning 50. Of course, our kids, diets, and menopause symptoms came up, but also the issue of needing to fulfill a purpose, to find finally the core of our passion. This magical thing that will move you forward and will bring you joy and a sense of fulfillment beyond your family. For me is easier than for others because I know exactly what my passion is. I have a strong drive to create and this drive has taken me to initiate many interesting projects. Many women find themselves lost in motherhood, routine and commitments that take them more and more away from finding their purpose. For them is harder…
So, ok, I knew clearly what my passion was and I had this amazing visual of how I wanted my life to be rather than the one I had. Then I asked myself: how do I start? Where do I start? How does this change look like? Well, if the clock is tickling, I must take some steps! Hard decisions needed to be made and a clear, straight conversation with my family had to be done. Their effort and support were crucial for the success of this great manifestation.
Two years ago, I started to visualize a dream for myself and for my family, and slowly things have been happening. At the beginning of this year, knowing the fact that my 50th birthday was coming, I got very determined to get things done. The fist thing was to sit down with my husband and let him know what I wanted. I told him that I wanted to be alone for a few weeks in Mexico with the purpose of working on my art.
We figured out the logistics of our finances and our family busy schedule. Our calendar was marked and crosses out so many times! We had many doubts and fears but we though that we could do this together. We decided that April/May were the best months to be away. This gave me enough time to let my students and their families know that I wouldn’t be teaching during the Spring term. Also enough time for my boys to get used to the idea. We decided to spend the spring break together in Oaxaca, so my family could get to know the place I was planning to spend sometime alone after our vacation.
Things got done, and I am now in Oaxaca, Mexico for 6 weeks! This first week has been a lot of adjusting for me. Getting used to my new place, the new neighborhood, the noises of barking dogs at night that bother my sleep, the groceries and the cooking, and the strange fact that I am not running my home and bossing my boys around! I am enjoying waking up on a sunny Oaxaca and exploring this wonderful city, its people and its culture. I talk to everyone on the streets and people are friendly, polite and very humble.
The purpose of this trip is to work on new art and start promoting the project I have been working for the past two years with my partner, Gaby Vichiz. It is a collaboration between myself and a group of women artisan from this magical state.
Has there been any anxiety? Yes! Mostly around which "goals and achievements" I should get out of this time. The fact that my family and I are doing such an effort adds up to the feeling of it. But, luckily I got to meditate on this and realized that this opportunity was given to me for a reason and that any result out of it is absolutely fine! "The stories you believe to be true are the ones your life will become" with love, Jazmin